October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, a month of education evolved from the first Day of Unity observed by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence in 1981.

Mayor Fred Butler, on Monday, made an official proclamation declaring the city’s recognition of the month, as well as of the work of LifeWire.

LifeWire — formerly the Eastside Domestic Violence Program — is a nonprofit that has served more than 124,000 people trapped in domestic violence situations since 1982, with the goal of transitioning them from victims to survivors.

In 2013, LifeWire responded to more than 10,300 calls on its 24-hour helpline, provided more than 35,000 nights of safe shelter for victims and educated more than 15,800 community members through its information and training programs.

“Staying at a shelter or working with a domestic violence advocate significantly reduces the likelihood that a victim will be abused again and improves the victim’s quality of life,” LifeWire Social Change Manager Ward Urion wrote in a recent letter that went out to neighborhood associations. “However, the need for our services continue to increase and the demand for our services is greater than our capacity.”

In light of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, LifeWire has provided the Reporter a list of things to keep in mind about domestic violence and abuse. Comprehensive information on the subject and programs offered by LifeWire can be found on lifewire.org.

Abuse isn’t just physical

In addition to physical domestic violence — use of any level of violence to intimidate, injure or endanger a partner — partner abuse can manifest sexually, psychologically and financially.

Sexual abuse occurs when one partner forces another in “unwanted, unsafe, or degrading sexual activity.” A marital or intimate relationship with consensual sex in other contexts is irrelevant — lack of enthusiastic consent is abuse.

Psychological and emotional abuse can be verbal or nonverbal and can include blaming, shaming and name-calling or quiet isolation and intimidation. Psychological abuse is just as harmful to the victim as physical abuse.

Financial abuse translates the one-sided power dynamic to the checkbook. The abuser enacts one-sided control of the victim’s relationship to money. This can be done in ways including the appropriation of all funds made by a partner, by forbidding a partner from working, or forcing the partner to take on the entirety of financial burden by putting all bills in the partner’s name.

The commonality between all four is a pattern of power, control and domination of one partner over another.

Partner violence is more common than you think

According to a 2000 survey by the National Institute of Justices and the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention, one in four women has experienced intimate partner violence in her lifetime.

Such violence isn’t exclusive to women, but women make up the majority of reported victims, at 85 percent. Up to 3 million women are physically abused by their partner each year.

Every day, an average of three women and one man are murdered by their partner.

‘Just leave’ can be dangerous advice

If you’ve discovered a loved one is a victim of domestic violence, it might seem logical to ask the person “Why don’t you just leave?” The period after a survivor leaves or expresses their intention to leave is the most lethal: a full 75 percent of domestic violence homicides and serious assaults occur during this time.

LifeWire offers a 24-hour crisis line at which trained staff assist with crisis intervention, safety planning, emotional support and information about domestic violence. That number is 425-746-1940.

Support is paramount

If you find yourself in a position to help a victim of domestic violence, the key steps are to listen, believe, educate and support. Support can be demanding, but survivors need to know they will not be abandoned.

It’s important that any questions you ask are open and nonjudgmental.

OK: “Did someone hurt you?,” or “I have a friend whose partner tries to control everything they do. Is this happening to you?”

Not OK: “What did you to provoke your partner?,” or “Why did you wait so long to tell someone?”